A weekend in tweets
Posted 23 days ago by Scott AndrewsSaturday February 13th, 2010
8:51AM
Safely ensconced in Starbucks on Villiers St, banging out Children’s Crusade. 1,000 words down so far, 9,000 to go by end of Sunday.
8:53AM
Have deserted wife and kids for weekend. Feel like bad husband/dad; but feel like righteous breadwinner. Must type! Type like the wind!!
9:40AM
The drunk-already twats who just sat down next to me have actually started drumming. All of them. In time, on the table. I may kill them.
9:46AM
Oh god now they’re singing the tune to Grange Hill. Anyone got a fork with a sausage on it? They want to put lyrics to it and do a cover.
9:51AM
Now they’re discussing how to get a ‘record company dude’ to come see one of their gigs. Tip: don’t offer them crappy covers of TV tunes.
9:53AM
“The beat was great: bang bang bang bang bang bangetty bang bang BANG!” “Wow. Is it on youtube?”
10:04AM
Popped to Boots, got earplugs, returned. Moved seats. BUT… they’ve got f***ing BONGOS out!!
10:12AM
Dear Starbucks, turning on the piped music to drown out the drumming collective Does. Not. Help. Bongos vs Buble – who will win?
10:52AM
Sitting in Starbucks on Villiers St writing a scene that takes place… in Starbucks on Villiers St! That’s research, baby, yeah!
10:59AM
2,250 words down. Nearly halfway to my day’s intended word count and it’s only 11am. Yay me.
11:12AM
@rabbitandcrow I love Glee. It’s High School Musical as written by Sith Lords. Come to the dark side, we have singalongs. Evil singalongs!
11:17AM
The bongos have left the building! This is good. The hit squad I dispatched are now free to make their move. Mwahahahaha!
11:33AM
YES! http://www.empireonline.com/news/feed.asp?NID=27007 The hardest men in all of France are back! I’m such a sucker for Musketeer movies.
12:06AM
3,000 words. I am on FIRE! Also: sick, coz this is nasty stuff I am writing today. Child trafficking, murder rooms & bad bad men.
12:14AM
@abaddonbooks Yes, that’s CC. No cannibalism this time, but there is a lot of very, very nasty stuff happening just off screen.
12:41AM
Lunch was tomato & pasta salad, fruit salad and smoothie. Healthy me. Now, back to work. 2,500 more words to write b4 home time.
I then got sucked into the vortex that was #sitcomdoctorwho and in short order tweeted:
- How I Met Your Mother (or was it Susan? or Romana? Or Donna, perhaps?)
- The Ood Life
- To The Mara Born
- 30 Raxicoricofallapatorius
- My Two Doctors
- Type 42, Where Are You?
2:05PM
Enough of this foolishness, 1,000 words to go! (And no more lattes or cheesecake. Working in Starbucks = not healthy really.)
But then::
- Mentors Behaving Badly
- Red Dwarf Star Alloy
- Saved By The Cloister Bell
- Suddenly Susan
2:12PM
Enough, I say!
2:37PM
A smurf just walked past outside. A real live smurf. Have perhaps drunk too much coffee.
2:50PM
@jamesmoran The 1TB Sky HD box is here! I want one sooo badly…. so I can store even more HD telly I never have time to watch.
3:18PM
5,000 :-)) Now home to wifey. I have hunted and gathered, my love, and I bring you – WORDS!
8:11PM
@jenni_hill Fat chance of that – tomorrow I’m back to Starbucks for day 2 of the great weekend writeathon. Got another 5,000 to do.
10:59PM
Just saw ep 4 of the new Survivors. I’ve enjoyed it well enough so far, but THAT was a show hitting its stride. Not written by Hodges, tho.
Sunday February 14th, 2010
8:52AM
Sick kids kept wifey up all night. Writeathon abandoned. Will resume next Sunday. Schedule slips again :-(
About 16 hours ago
So the reason my breadmaker bread is so incredibly dense and solid is that I’ve been using the wrong yeast all this time. D’ough!
About 16 hours ago
Stayed home to help exhausted Emma, but had pre-migraine head all day & been f**k all help & big, grouchy hindrance. Happy Valentine, wifey!
About 16 hours ago
Sunday = #husbandfail #dadfail #valetinefail #romancefail #writingfail. This means, I think, that it must be wine-o-clock.
All about ME
Posted 26 days ago by Scott AndrewsIt’s namealike week on Facebook.
As the first Scott Andrews on gmail, I have the definitive Scott Andrews gmail address. The only problem with early adoption is that all the other Scott Andrewses have taken addresses like scott.andrews@ and scott-middleinitial-andrews@
Consequently, because we are an accident prone bunch, people often forget the qualifiers and I end up with email meant for all my not-quite-so-quick-to-jump-aboard-the-google-train namesakes.
So, in honour of namealikes week, here are my top five namesakes and the details of our email mixups. All true, folks!
Monday
Scott Andrews, politician
I am a member of the Canadian parliament representing the Liberal Party and the people of get this – Avalon! So back off Morgaine or I’ll play Robin Sparkles – Canada’s greatest teen pop idol sensation, like, ever – at you!
Email mixup Some guy from Halifax started emailing me his weekly Ice Hockey and local affairs columns, which I presume were not meant for the English me.
Tuesday
Scott Andrews, Associate Professor & Associate Chair, Department of English; Coordinator, American Indian Studies Program, California State University, Northridge
Today I have foresaken Canadian politics to become an enrolled member of the Cherokee nation of Oklahoma and a teacher. Read my guest blog on Teen Superheroes!
Email mixup This gentleman is probably the intended recipient of the UPS package tracking emails I occasionally receive.
Wednesday
Scott Andrews, the (other) writer
I have abandoned academia and become the Editor-in-Chief and Publisher of the pro-rate ezine Beneath Ceaseless Skies.
Email mixup Fabulously, this Scott’s editor emailed me her edits on one of his short stories, thinking it was mine… oops! (To be fair, as a writer, he’s no slouch.)
Thursday
Scott Andrews, the doctor
Having failed in politics, academia and writing I have decided to pursue a career in medicine. I now practice family medicine in New York, New York.
Email mixup 30/10/09: “I was recommened to you by a coworker. Would you have time to see me today? I have had the cold since Saturday and now I think I have an ear infection. I was told you office is at 42 Broadway. Please let me know. I have oxford for health insurance.”
Friday
I work for Him
Somewhere in America, there is yet another Scott Andrews.
He’s very different to me, in that whereas I am atheistic to the point of near rabidity, he is a Christian. Not only that, he’s an active member of staff at a church.
I regularly receive email meant for him about Christian summer camps, campaigns to raise money for the rebuilding of Christian summer camps that have been razed to the ground by lightning strikes, and encouraging posts about the totals raised so far and how that proves God is looking out for them except, y’know, in respect of lightning strikes.
I normally just alert the sender that they’ve got the wrong Scott Andrews and we have a light hearted email exchange. No harm no foul, all very jovial.
In August last year, I got a job application intended for him. I’d read most of it before I worked out what it was.
This would-be church employee had filled in his application form dutifully, including his social security number, driver’s licence number, address, phone, DOB and, helpfully, had scanned in his actual signature at the end.
In fact, he had just handed me everything I could possibly need to steal his identity. Yikes. We had a friendly email exchange about the mixup and I sent him on his way.
As a card carrying disciple of the church of Dawkins, two things about the application form and email exchange that preceded it – which was helpfully copied in the email – signify that it had come from a land where the people are Not Like Me.
First, the email from the man inviting him to apply concludes with the sign off:
“Thanks for being willing to Serve Him!”
It’s the capital letters which make it seem like the dialogue of a satanic acolyte from a Hammer Horror film.
Secondly, in the section where the applicant has to detail his current employment he is asked to name his supervisor.
You know what he wrote there, don’t you?
That’s right: “God”
Which, given that he works for a software development company in Idaho, strikes me as unlikely.
Comment [1]
Shhh!
Posted 34 days ago by Scott AndrewsBe vewy, vewy qwiet! Scott is working
Radio silence due to working hard on Children’s Crusade. I’ve finished the first third and am motoring on nicely. Had to turn down another writing gig coz of deadline pressure, which smarts coz it was a SWEET gig working with people I’m a really huge fan of. But heigh ho, them’s the breaks. Better to deliver one really good thing on time than two poor things or, worse, miss a deadline altogether.
I also appeared at a Stargate convention for a heartwarming re-enactment of the record store scene in Spinal Tap. One audience member. One. Smell the Glove, baby!
In my downtime – what downtime? – I am amusing myself by watching Glee, which is evil camp at its finest (come to the darkside, we have singalongs!) and reading screenplays (Edge of Darkness – very well written indeed and acceptably faithful to the original until the final act where it just misses the point completely; Mix Tape – clever and very moving; Kickass – oh my god, did I just read what I think I just read!?!?)
Tonight I am having a night off to go to the big moving pictures for the first time in ages to see Avatar in 3D, which should be fun. Then, on Saturday, a big event – Kitty’s first trip to the cinema, to see The Princess and the Frog. She is SO excited (and so am I!)
I am also Tweeting like the devil, having finally got the point of Twitter. I squeed very loudly indeed when @amandapalmer retweeted me. I’m @ahaeserus if you fancy tracking me down.
Also: new headshot taken by photo-wifey, viewable on my Amazon page. I think I look acceptably sinister; others have commented that I look like a Victorian convict.
Finally, is this the weirdest thing ever to be posted on the interwebs? I think it may be.
Children's Crusade
Posted 49 days ago by Scott AndrewsComing May, 2010
The Afterblight Chronicles: Children’s Crusade
The orphaned children of post-Cull Britain have always been easy prey for gangs, cults and killers. But now something has changed.
Organised teams are roaming the country, taking children from their homes and villages, spiriting them away into the night.
Jane Crowther is willing to risk everything to rescue them, but to save the children Jane must confront the woman she used to be, and the man who killed her.
This is the third and final year of St Mark’s school for Boys and Girls. But it’s not going down without a fight!
New interview
Posted 54 days ago by Scott AndrewsThose nice folks at Pornokitsch have published a new interview with me in two parts.
It’s the place to go for your first look at the cover for Children’s Crusade and, finally, some details of my forthcoming plays for Big Finish.
